Who Moved My Gruyère?

Have you ever read the book "Who Moved My Cheese?" Yeah don't bother. I remember someone telling me years ago to read it. Definitely a half an hour I'd love to get back. The thing is, I'm a real cheese lover and I was under the impression that it was a suspense thriller about somebody actually trying to locate their missing cheese. Turns out it's some sort of a parable about how to deal with change in your life. Needless to say it was pretty disappointing. I really felt the author failed to scratch the surface with his analysis of the central query. I thought the question begging to be asked was "What kind of cheese was it exactly that was moved?" Because if we're talking about something along the lines of Velveeta then it's really not even worth asking the question. Now if we're talking about mascarpone or a nice aged cheddar then please get to the bottom of this immediately. I will say however that the one good thing about this book is that it's a testament to the fact that just about anybody out there could be a best selling author.

Speaking of cheese and deep meaning.... I tend to spend a lot of time in deep contemplative reflection about life's big questions. Like just a little while ago I had an extensive discussion with my sister about what our favourite cheeses were. Yeah, these are the questions that keep me up at night. For a lot of people this would seem like a frivolous question but the great thing about my sister is that she'll actually engage in a thoughtful discussion about them. The discussion got off to a rocky start when my sister stated that mozzarella was her cheese of choice. I think blindsided would be the best way to describe my feelings at the time. Are you kidding me? Mozzarella?? B-O-R-I-N-G! I strongly believe that Gruyère is unequivocally THE greatest cheese ever. Hands frigging down! It's just so versatile. Not only can you eat a block of it on its own (tasty but not recommended) but you can throw it in macaroni & cheese, on a salad, in a quiche or use it to make the world's greatest grilled cheese sandwich. Plus, it's named after a beautiful little town in Switzerland. Seriously, what's not to love about this cheese?

Anyway, she insisted that mozzarella was her choice which initially I didn't understand. I think the main reason I didn't share her opinion was because she has a lot more access to top quality fresh mozzarella than I do. If there's one thing I've learned about mozzarella it's that not all mozzarella cheeses are created equal. First of all, the dried up crap you buy in most north American supermarkets is a distant third cousin, twice removed from "real" mozzarella. So in that context I sort of had a bit more appreciation for her choice. Plus, the whole point I guess of these types of discussions is to open your mind to the possibilities outside of your own frame of reference. Oh and it's also important to make sure people know that under no circumstances is it okay to move your cheese. In fact, it's best to just not move things people are planning on eating. At least that was the sobering lesson I took away from the book "Who Moved My Hummus?: The Origins of the Israeli-Palestinian Conflict". Trust me, it's some scary stuff.