I think I know what Snoop Dogg was talking about now. I lost a $20 bill yesterday. Yeah, I know you're thinking "yeah, then what" but for some reason it was very frustrating and it's really stuck in my craw. I obviously don't know exactly when or where it happened and I didn't realize it until it was too late to retrace my steps. I know it's just $20 and that I waste money on a very regular basis but something about just losing money for no good reason is really annoying.
It reminded me of a somewhat similar situation that happened a couple of years ago. My sister was staying with me at the time and since she was "between opportunities" money was a little tight. One day I gave her $20 to pick up some some groceries. Before she left I gave her a talk reminiscent of the one Harry gives Lloyd in the movie "Dumb & Dumber". I gave her "the last of our dough" and instructed her to pick up "just the essentials" Okay, I didn't really give her a pep talk before she left but in hindsight maybe I should have.
As she left her mood was bright and there may have even been skipping and whistling. You know that feeling you got when you were a kid and your mom gave you a couple of dollars to go buy candy at the store? Yeah, me neither but I think this was what it would have looked like. Unfortunately, within a few minutes she returned to my apartment empty handed and looking rather dejected. I thought maybe she had forgotten something but as it turned out she got to the store and realized she had lost the $20 somewhere on the way to the store. I was worried that at this rate, the two of us were on pace to make Lloyd and Harry look like Mensa candidates. Not to worry though, if there's one thing I'll say about my sister it's that she's a very quick learner. Please, my mama didn't raise no fools!
"I'm not going to wear these pants anymore" she explained. I wasn't quite following the logic here but she continued, "These pants have holes in both of the pockets and that's where I put the money so I think that's probably how I lost it." Did I also mention that my sister has amazing powers of deduction? I immediately got Angela Lansbury on the blower to let her know that her services would no longer be required because my sister had put an end to this baffling mystery all by her lonesome.
The truth was, my sister was far more annoyed by the whole thing than I was. Sure we couldn't afford to eat for a week but for some reason I found the situation quite funny at the time. It's just money right? Plus, as the Good Book says "Money is the root of all evil." Then again, my dad always told us that the "lack of money was the root of all evil". So I guess you could understand if the two of us didn't know how to feel about the situation. Now that I'm thinking about it, I guess that means that my sister's pants were the root of all evil since they were seriously lacking in the money department. When I think about it that way I guess we were lucky to just lose the $20 considering how often she wore those pants. Speaking of which, I should probably give her a call and make sure she got rid of those pants...and to see if she can lend me $20.
Thursday, May 31, 2007
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Welcome In, Welcome In...Shame About the Weather
So it's the first long weekend of the summer here and that whole global warming thing Al Gore was talking about just seems to be a bunch of broken promises. I think this is the third time this month that I've put away a bunch of my winter clothes thinking that I wouldn't need them for a few months only to find myself digging them out two days later as I realize that there's a good chance I could catch pneumonia if I don't throw a sweater over my tankini. It's not that I have a problem with having to hold off on wearing my tankini, it's just that I'd like a little consistency. If it's going to be spring then great let's do spring but if it's going to be summer then let's do that for more than a day and a half.
As much as I love the springtime I have to say that there is one thing that I despise about the springtime and it is the return of the bicycle shorts. I guess I've just always been more of a fan of form over function so I just don't understand why there isn't any way to make bicycle shorts less hideous looking? Is spandex the only material that can be used in this particular application? I just want to know why the bicycle short technology has not come further than this. Ordinarily bicycle shorts are not something I spend a great deal of time thinking about but there's this guy at work who bikes to work everyday in a rather revealing pair of these shorts. Despite the fact that he changes shortly after he arrives every morning, the site of him in those shorts, even for a brief moment makes it very difficult to a) keep my breakfast down and b) take him even a little bit seriously in the work environment. Like the other day he was talking in a meeting and he said something to the effect of "although last quarter's results fell a little short of our targets..." and I felt like saying "and speaking of little shorts...". So from then on I couldn't hear a word he was saying.
On a positive work related note, I did have a rather productive day at work the other day. I've recently taken up the game of squash. I've sort of always been intrigued by the sport since it seems like everyone who plays it gets really into it. Plus, there's a squash court in the fitness facility we have at work and so I figured it was a good opportunity to give it a shot. So for the last month I've been practicing and practicing with this one guy at work who actually is a really good player and who's been kind of showing me the ropes. So last week he told me that he thought I was at the point where I probably wouldn't embarrass myself if I started playing other people. Boy did I feel on top of the world when he put it that way. The next day at work I started talking to one of the guys who works with me who used to be quite a squash player until he injured his knee and I was telling him that I was looking for people to play against. He suggested I get in touch with his wife since she's a pretty good player and she'd probably be up for it. He gave me her phone number and since I didn't have a piece of paper on me I started writing it on the inside of my hand. About an hour later I was talking to another one of my colleagues and he noticed the number on my hand as I was talking and asked "What's that on the inside of your hand?" For a split second I thought about making something up but then just replied "Well, it's actually Jim's wife's phone number." Before I could explain why I had her number he responded "Good job. I've been trying to get her number for months." We both had a good laugh about it but unfortunately, it actually was kind of a step up for me. The last phone number I got at work was from a married 58 year old man who had three kids that were all older than me...and I don't think he wanted me to play squash with his wife.
Before I close I guess I should explain the title of this blog entry. It's a line from a Travis song called "My Eyes" off their new album called "The Boy With No Name". It is currently my favourite song. I think I've played this song about fifty times since I bought their new album yesterday. If you are or have ever been a Travis fan I'd recommend checking the album out. They don't chart a lot of new territory but they do what they do best. Either way, I'd recommend at least checking out this song.
By the way, another post will follow shortly with highlights from my recent road trip. I thought having teasers for upcoming posts would really boost readership interest. If it doesn't work though I'll just go back to posting once every six months which also seems to take anticipation to record heights.
As much as I love the springtime I have to say that there is one thing that I despise about the springtime and it is the return of the bicycle shorts. I guess I've just always been more of a fan of form over function so I just don't understand why there isn't any way to make bicycle shorts less hideous looking? Is spandex the only material that can be used in this particular application? I just want to know why the bicycle short technology has not come further than this. Ordinarily bicycle shorts are not something I spend a great deal of time thinking about but there's this guy at work who bikes to work everyday in a rather revealing pair of these shorts. Despite the fact that he changes shortly after he arrives every morning, the site of him in those shorts, even for a brief moment makes it very difficult to a) keep my breakfast down and b) take him even a little bit seriously in the work environment. Like the other day he was talking in a meeting and he said something to the effect of "although last quarter's results fell a little short of our targets..." and I felt like saying "and speaking of little shorts...". So from then on I couldn't hear a word he was saying.
On a positive work related note, I did have a rather productive day at work the other day. I've recently taken up the game of squash. I've sort of always been intrigued by the sport since it seems like everyone who plays it gets really into it. Plus, there's a squash court in the fitness facility we have at work and so I figured it was a good opportunity to give it a shot. So for the last month I've been practicing and practicing with this one guy at work who actually is a really good player and who's been kind of showing me the ropes. So last week he told me that he thought I was at the point where I probably wouldn't embarrass myself if I started playing other people. Boy did I feel on top of the world when he put it that way. The next day at work I started talking to one of the guys who works with me who used to be quite a squash player until he injured his knee and I was telling him that I was looking for people to play against. He suggested I get in touch with his wife since she's a pretty good player and she'd probably be up for it. He gave me her phone number and since I didn't have a piece of paper on me I started writing it on the inside of my hand. About an hour later I was talking to another one of my colleagues and he noticed the number on my hand as I was talking and asked "What's that on the inside of your hand?" For a split second I thought about making something up but then just replied "Well, it's actually Jim's wife's phone number." Before I could explain why I had her number he responded "Good job. I've been trying to get her number for months." We both had a good laugh about it but unfortunately, it actually was kind of a step up for me. The last phone number I got at work was from a married 58 year old man who had three kids that were all older than me...and I don't think he wanted me to play squash with his wife.
Before I close I guess I should explain the title of this blog entry. It's a line from a Travis song called "My Eyes" off their new album called "The Boy With No Name". It is currently my favourite song. I think I've played this song about fifty times since I bought their new album yesterday. If you are or have ever been a Travis fan I'd recommend checking the album out. They don't chart a lot of new territory but they do what they do best. Either way, I'd recommend at least checking out this song.
By the way, another post will follow shortly with highlights from my recent road trip. I thought having teasers for upcoming posts would really boost readership interest. If it doesn't work though I'll just go back to posting once every six months which also seems to take anticipation to record heights.
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